Hmm. Bad Posterous not autopublishing.

I have my Posterous account connected to WordPress and anything I post there is supposed to autopost here. It WAS functioning. Gues I have some investigating to do. You can read missed posts by going to http://padschicago.posterous.com/. I am very sorry for the inconvenience and my lack of insight to this problem. I will check on things more frequently.

What am I doing?

I have just been so busy to trying to get too much done (and no way to finish all I want to do)! It would help if I didn’t live like this–going to homeless shelters, a new one every night of the week, in different towns, needing my feet or other transportation to get there. Some are several miles out! I am lucky and managed to get a ride to tonight’s shelter or else I would be walking 8 miles or so in the rain. I’ve done it plenty of times before, rain or snow, doesn’t matter the weather–its a safe, warm, shelter at the end when I get there. It’s worth it!

During the day I might be found at the library. Which isn’t the easiest or most efficient environment for getting things done! For one, computers have time limits. They are also usually s-l-o-o-o-w. I also like to use my own software from a flash drive and not all libraries allow that. Libraries use filters online and on occasion a perfectly harmless and good website gets blocked. There are distractions also, such as people not obeying the “quiet zone” rules and talking on their cell phones or talking to friends. I am also part of the problem by habitually trying to do too much at once. At any given time you will see me on the computer with two browsers open, one with at least 10-12+ tabs, the other only two or three; and my email program; an Explorer window to easily, always, have instant access to all my files available; Word or other MS Office program; a program to edit my website; and perhaps a chat program, which I rarely use. Maybe more programs. I also can distract easily, like my attempts at multi-tasking by having too many programs and windows open, and will jump from one project to another. Another yet reason? The library is just not a “work” environment to me. I used to only come to the library for recreation and with my kids. After all this time, it is still  hard to stay out of that mentality that it’s not playtime.

The best option for me would be to get in to a different environment, one that has all available supplies and tools, and is structured so I know exactly what I am expected to do. And I will do it. Provided my mental health issues don’t get in the way… But that is another subject for another day.

Unfortunately, it is almost time for me to go. I have been working on this post for almost two hours. In addition to some of the above distractions, I have also been having pain issues which developed suddenly while writing this. I have pushed myself to at least somewhat finish this. I had wanted to stop what I was doing and try to finish tomorrow but I have a little determination in me. Plus, it does offer a little distraction from the pain. Not much. But it is something else for me to focus on.

Vote for Me for Open Web Awards!

Crazed!

My mind is crazed. I can’t think. I went to the shelter office to turn in a copy of my TB test, and the case”worker” decided he needed to sit down and talk to me about an email and what happened between him, the director, and me a short while back. To remind you in short, it caused me a bad PTSD freakout due to malicious behavior on the director’s part! Since that place now is an emotional trigger for me, I didn’t react nicely to talking to him about it! Then he took his loooooong time to make the copy of my TB test–stopping to talk to other staff about me first before doing it and returning the original to me. (Did ya have to stop at Kinko’s for the copy too?!?!) It took forever! Meanwhile I was getting even more pissed off and agitated! I took some Propranolol to relax some and it has helped but my mind is still fried. I am relaxed enough to not be screaming and B* too many swear words writing this. I got out to the main room there today and when someone mentioned him to me I referred to the case”worker” as an @*****. One of the people he needed to talk to about me (prior to giving me back my original TB test result?!) was evidently the person in charge of the place–”about a ‘related’ issue”. Wow! I feel honored! The executive director had interest in talking to him about me! I almost have to think or wonder, have ya guys got it who I am behind all this web stuff?! Of course with my name and face posted online now, the evidence is there. And I don’t care. I have a voice–I have a right–to post my opinions and experiences. I have thus far respected them and not given them bad publicity by mentioning the name of the actual shelter/homeless services program that I am registered with. I am getting closer to doing it though as more happens. Part of me is almost dying to get the word out what this place is really like! I started this blog wanting to keep open and not bad mouth any particular agency. I thought that I could still write about events and still make readers aware. It just doesn’t feel right to me to single any one out with negative publicity. But I am wondering if maybe I should?

Where have I been?!

I have been posting pretty regularly on Twitter so you can catch me there if I’m not on my blog.  I am very, very sorry for the lack of posting as well as for doing almost nothing for updating my site. Homelessness is hard.  So is having PTSD and mood issues, besides pain and health problems.  I guess that I have been taking a “vacation” from many things in life and trying to recoup by not “working” as much on things I ought to do.  Not that I am financially reimbursed for the work and time I do as part of my site, faxing and emailing providers to ask for free or discount services for the homeless, and trying to set up a directory.  But its something I love to do!  The reward of getting a response back from someone saying that they will help–its enormous to me!  I feel like I have let people and myself down by not doing this for the past month.  I was productive and busy, faxing and emailing, and updating my website and blog, making a directory of services, trying to do way too much all at once!  It really saddens me to think how little I have done and only posting on Twitter–and not even every day.  With thanks to Mark Horvath from InvisiblePeople.TV and all the inspiration I am getting since meeting him, I am starting to feel renewed–and perhaps almost even a little bit overwhelmed and scared.  I don’t know what is coming forth to me by appearing in his video but here I am opening up and admitting who I am as a homeless person.  I had a personal setback a couple weeks ago and have been starting over with trying to find new housing and health care.  Then I received the message from Mark Horvath as @hardlynormal on Twitter that he had just arrived in Chicago, and got his tweet about meeting him.  And the response from it has been simply amazing!  Talk about a mood booster!!  I can’t believe the response I am seeing from this and have no doubt that something will come of this!  I am feeling so much inspiration and I can’t thank everyone enough!  Please, please, keep this attitude flowing!  And for those inclined, keep the prayers coming.   I have so much more to say but I will end this here…for now.

Sorry you missed me

I just left the chat room.  I got to meet people from around the world!  The data from my website show people reach it from all over the USA, plus the UK, Africa, Spain–literally all over the world!  I really am impressed with myself!  LOL.  And I happy to have met some of my followers in chat today.  Thank you for visiting!

I am trying to decide on a regular chat time.  Please tell me if you are interested in being at a chat but a certain time frame would work best for you–I will take it under consideration in my planning!  I would like to use chat time for Q&A, to get to know you, and your needs, comments and feedback, anything about homelessness or poverty.

Let’s chat!

Attention:  I am in the chat room for a little while so  please stop by and say hi!

YES!!!

I got  response back from an optometry office and we can get charity care help from them!  I am so excited!!!

Sigh. I need a credit/debit card.

I’m trying to send faxes again but since I have to use free online fax services, I am severely limited in how many faxes I can send out until I can get a credit/debit card with money on it to subscribe to an online fax service to send faxes.  I can receive faxes now for free using eFax.  Problem is I have no income, and online fax services typically have a set-up fee, monthly fee, plus a fee per page.  Sounds like motivation to find a real job and paycheck.

Let’s get help!

I am typing away, emailing and faxing, trying to get health care for the homeless! I get a lot of requests for referrals to optometrists, chiropractors, dentists, and more. Well, as promised, I AM working on it! In the past I acquired complete eye care one-time-only for 20 local homeless. That has inspired me to continue and expand my efforts! This is entirely a personal project of mine. I am doing this on my own to find help for myself and others. That’s the focus of Pads Chicago–to educate and empower ourselves!

Those of you so inclined, say prayers that we get the extra help we need–thanks! If you are or know someone in health care who may be willing to help, please let me know or ask them to contact me:

Email: padschicago@aol.com
Fax: (661) 885-6105

All providers of services will be added to Pads Chicago’s Friends! Thank you for your help!!